Playground Rules for Grown-up Girls

Today I'm thrilled to be linking up with a couple of blogging rookies like myself!

I'd like to introduce you to my friend Allie (on the right).  Allie and her best friend Tegan recently launched their blog, Shecago.  (Isn' that name great?  If you couldn't already tell they live in Chicago.)  

When Allie and I were planning this first blog share we decided the perfect topic would be friendships.   

I've found that once you become a mom it can be even more difficult to keep your adult friendships.  Unfortunately I know first-hand.  You really have to work hard to maintain those relationships.  Whether you're a mother or not there are certain "rules" you should follow that will help you play nice.   

{{After you read these make sure you click over to Allie & Tegan's blog Shecago for their rules!}}   

1. Time is of the essence, make sure you spend it wisely.  Basically, when you actually have time to spend with your friends make sure you’re with the people who matter and that you’re 100% there.  It’s so easy for moms to have their minds elsewhere, like worrying for their kids. Put the phone down, focus on the person you're with, and make use of the time you have.

 

2. Don't compare yourself to anyone but yourself.  One of the great things about friendships is inspiring one another.  Just make sure that doesn't cross over to comparison because there's a fine line between the two.  Perhaps your best friend has no kids and hours to spend at the gym.  That doesn't mean you have to give yourself a hard time for working out twice (ok maybe once) a week.  We each have our own paths in life, make yours your own.  Jealousy ruins so many friendships.

3. When planning time with friends, set a date and stick to it!  I am 90% more likely to follow through with plans when we pick a date and put it on our calendars.  You truly have to MAKE time!

4. Be open & honest.  When you’re having a bad day don’t be afraid to share it with your friends.  It’s much better than holding it all in and unleashing on them later.  Whether they’ve been in the same situation before or not, your true friends will be there to lend an ear.  And if you're on the receiving end of your friend's rant all you have to do is listen to her.  You don't have to solve anything, just let her vent.   

5. Last but not least and my favorite of them all - enjoy a girls’ night out once a month!  It’s healthy for you to get away and have your girl time every now and then.  You deserve it!

We hope you enjoyed our first blog-share!  Thanks to Allie for setting this up and supporting me and my little blog.  Allie and I both cheered for the Jags but during different seasons.  While we haven't spent too much time together we have so many mutual friends that I consider her a friend.  She has such an upbeat personality and is uber creative.  (Example, that blog name!  Genius!)  Allie is also a wonderful photographer and has this dry sense of humor that I can totally relate to.  Allie & Tegan cover everything from fashion to home decor to food on their blog and I'm excited to begin working with them.  This will be the first of many blog-shares to come.  Make sure you follow them to keep up with their Shecago shenanigans!

Linking up with Bethany and Meghan for Three-fer Thursday!

Inspiring Instagrammers You Should Follow

Do you love Instagram like I do?  

I find myself spending much more time on Instagram rather than Facebook these days.  It's more streamlined, which I love.  I can enjoy pictures without clutter: no ads, no play-by-play of life from the same people, no "suggested friends", you get the idea.  I love seeing snapshots from inspiring people & companies I admire.  There are a handful that I always stay up-to-date on because they're THAT good.  Each of these accounts inspire me in different ways: fashion, faith, family, and many more.  Make sure you check each of these out and follow along with me!

@shopdandy

My dear friend Danielle is a huge sensation on Instagram.  So many women turn to her account for daily outfit inspirations and uplifting posts, myself included!  She has this wonderful way of pairing classic pieces like Louis Vuitton and Celine handbags with affordable, trendy items from ASOS, Dorothy Perkins & Target.  I promise she will not let you down! (Side note: Danielle has already helped me tremendously with my blogging and I am so grateful for her thoughtfulness and guidance!)

{{Visit Danielle's blog at www.justdandy.org}}

Life Lessons For My 15-Year-Old Self

Do you ever stop and reflect on how far you've come and how much you've changed through the years?  I do.  I can remember how it felt to be 15 in high school wondering where I fit in.  Who were my friends?  Who was I?  What kind of person did I want to be?    

Sometimes I wonder what I would tell myself if I could go back in time.  What advice would I give myself to avoid being hurt and to avoid hurting others?  While I don't regret the decisions I've made I know I could have benefited from these life lessons.

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1.  Think before you speak.  

You will put your foot in your mouth more times than you can remember. 

Words can cut like a knife, be careful with how you use them.

5 Friends Every Girl Needs

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The older I get the more I appreciate my friends. 

My friendships have helped to mold me into the person that I am.  I can be stubborn, brutally honest, mean - and yet I still have friends who love me.  They see me for the person I am most of the time - caring, uplifting, funny, protective.  While I'm so grateful for the friends I have now I'm also grateful for those broken friendships.  I truly believe people come into our lives for a reason or a season and sometimes those seasons end sooner than expected and that's OK. There are lessons to be learned from each of them.

When I survey the friends I have now they each have certain overriding characteristics that I love.  Every girl needs at least one of these types of friends.  You may even have a few friends who fall into multiple categories - score!

1 - The Cheerleader

No, I'm not talking about literal cheerleaders (although many of my friends are retired cheerleaders).  I'm talking about the girl who has your back no matter what.  She is always there for you supporting whatever you do.  She is in your corner and will fight for you without thinking twice.   

2 - The Free Spirit

This friend is up for anything!  Need a night out? She'll drop everything and go!  She has nothing tying her down and is always up for making memories.  She lives the impromptu, spontaneous life and sometimes you just need someone like that to remind you to relax and have fun.

3 - The Goof

In my opinion, someone who makes me laugh is invaluable.  This friend knows how to cheer you up in a second.  She is most likely equiped with so many random, hilarious stories about her life that you can't help but think they're made up.  She can quote entire Will Ferrell movies and reinact your college shenanigans.  When you find a friend like that, don't let her go!

4 - The Scholar

Again, I'm not talking about a literal scholar.  I'm referring to the friend who's been there, done that, and gives you amazing advice about what to do.  She's experienced things you haven't and has learned from them.  What distinguishes her from most people is that you actually WANT & VALUE her opinion.  You find yourself running all major life decisions by her.

5 - The Time Traveler

This is the friend you can go months & years without seeing and when you finally have the chance to catch up it's like no time has passed.  Perhaps you live in different cities or your lives are just too hectic to talk or see each other as often as you'd like.  That doesn't matter with her.  She understands.  She's not going anywhere.  Bonds like that are priceless.

So, what kind of friend are you?  What type of friend would your girlfriends say you are? You may be a different type of friend to different people.  To some people I may be a Scholar but to others I'm a Time Traveler.  I like to think I'm always a Goof but I'm probably not as funny as I think. Haha.

I bet you thought of at least a handful of friends, share this with them!

As always, thank you for stopping by my blog today.  I really appreciate you!

With love & gratitude,

Heather

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